Thursday, November 16, 2006

How do I feel when I think of sharing our brokenness with others?

Beloved,
thank you for always reminding me to focus on us, and not the problems in the family. It shows me that you feel our marriage is a priority.

When I think of sharing our brokenness with others I feel scared, hopeful, and excited. It is scary because I know when people know what we've been through, they will never look at us the same way again. I worry that people in the family will be hurt that we didn't keep them in the loop about our lives. I am scared that they won't respect you anymore.

It is exciting, though, because I believe that God can make good come from any circumstances if we let Him. The end never justifies the means, but God can take a bad situation and use it for some good. I am hoping that we can be used to help someone else. How comforting it could have been for us to talk to another couple who had been through it and have them say,"You CAN be happy again!" If we can help one couple avoid this, or help one couple heal, then this pain will have been worth while.

I also think that if we can help other it will be good for us as well. It will remind us of how easily things like this can happen if we're not careful. I am hopeful that if we talk about it, having that reminder will prevent us from going down this road again.

Finally, months ago you and I read a verse in James that I always keep in the back of my mind. "Let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from the error of his way will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins." Whether you look at it as Karma, what goes around comes around, or Divine punishment for sins, there are consequences to selfish actions. I believe, and know you do to, that helping others (among other things) can help make reparation and atone for what you did.

I love you so much,

your wife

2 comments:

Mea Culpa said...

I believe now more than ever that every action has a reaction. From the standpoint of "karma," when we do something good, we get even better in return. When we do something bad, we get something even worse in return. We have seen this in many instances and it holds true.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for this blog. My husband and I are going through something similar right now.

My husband and I newlyweds and are devout Catholics who, like yourself, waited to be with them until being married. I had a one-time encounter which has resulted in conceiving a child.

I have devastated my husband and our marriage and I'm working to repair our marriage and to do what it takes to heal our marriage. My husband wants the child to be given up for adoption and while that is painful, my vocation is to be his wife; our marriage is a sacrament.

I initially was looking for information on retrouvaille and came across your blog.

I wanted to thank you for this blog and for the hope it offers to me and to others healing.

It's hard to think of myself as a "good Catholic" anymore; I pray for God's grace and mercy.

God Bless.