My Love,
your confidence is something that is very attractive in you. Right now you seem to have a healthy mixture of confidence and humility, that is so appealing.
It is hard for me to ask help from you. It is hard for me to show vulnerability, I think because my Mom never had much patience for it. After Benedict was born, I felt like I was drowning most of the time in the fatigue, pain, and overwhelming new responsibility. I should have asked for help, but didn't want you to worry or have additional burdens. I also didn't want you to think I wasn't a good mother to our new son.
I need your help by accepting that confidence isn't one of my qualities, and being patient when I put myself down. I want you to remind me of my better qualities and lovingly help me see that perhaps I'm not being reasonable.
I need your continued help with Benedict when you are able. You have been so helpful with that, and I just need you to continue exactly as you have been doing.
I also need to know that you are still committed to working through our problems. Please don't be impatient with our progress or at times what feels like a lack of progress. I need to know that you are always willing to fight for us and our love. I need to know that you don't ever regret staying with me and not going to her.
Love,
Your gentler half
Monday, September 18, 2006
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2 comments:
So this is what I took from your letter, please tell me if it is accurate:
You need me to be patient when you put yourself down and also remind you of your good qualities. Can you give me an example of a time when I was able to lovingly show you that what you said wasn't reasonable?
You also need to know that I am committed and willing to fight and not regret it. Do you have an example of a time I showed I was committed?
I will have to think of the first thing.
When you signed us up for Retrouvaille. When you didn't leave after an especially bad fight. You stayed around to work things out.
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