Proud

My husband,
I am very proud of your letter, and how you handled all the events after "revelation." Your priority, as it should be, has been to make things right with me. However, you did the decent thing by her too. I know it was hard apologizing to her and humbling admitting that you know you deserve hell, but it took a lot of character to say it anyway. Did she deserve your kind words? Not at all. But we have to behave in a way that is decent for our own sake, not for anyone else's. I hope you always look back on your treatment of her since the affair (cutting off contact, etc.) and feel satisfaction that you finally were doing the right thing.

When I compare how you have talked to her vs. her responses to you, you have both proved your character. Yes, you weren't warm, but you also weren't cruel or spiteful. Her actions now show what kind of woman she is inside: bitter, angry, hateful, and entirely unable to accept responsibility for her actions or feel remorse. There's something almost inhuman being that devoid of tender honest feelings.

Thank God you didn't end up with her. A few more months of her poison and you could have been just as jaded and thoroughly perverse.